Bloodlust Game (poem)

Little things; The human things that made me happy

Are all gone.

I'm starving, thirsting, for more - old or new

Anything to sate my appetite

Fill this whole forming in my core

To stop any others from forming in my chest

But instead I get less.

Empty words, admired less

I tried to force my smiles less

It's not working

Yet you're so worth it

I'll work through it

But I must admit...

If this is better, I don't want the best

I want a chaotic mess

A storm through my living room

A whirlwind begging, screaming "yes"

Not: you, you, you can be next

When your heart's not in it

Everything's pointless

Like the remnants of a shipwreck

Yeah she's there, but she's sinking fast

Drowning beauty; salt-water ties her happiness

And I don't think it's too much to ask

Not to have to force a fall for the past

I'm not the same

Since he came, and the one before him...

Yeah, I've changed.

Torn by two extremes

But never in between

Would you ask your life to settle in the seams?

I'm a killer or a queen

To me they're both the to blame

Now everything means nothing to me

Sure, I like him like a game

   That's already been played

But I crave hellp like a bloodlust I could never tame

Torn by two extremes

With my skin between their teeth

Am I good enough to love?

Or good enough to eat?

Either way the devil's knocking

Urging me to run

But I can't escape my old ways

Until my truths are gone

One- cursing, throwing, kissing, knowing, sure I'm young but I've been growing

   Fell too fast, but he saw it'd come to that

Two- he tasted, never wasted, biting, bleeding, loving, leaving.

   He's the one I could be needing now...

But I don't want my bloodlust

I want to run away

Escape a little, trip some more

Become addicted to new pain

Starting today I feel nothing

I don't think my heart will play

Or stray.

At least not for just any game.